Are You Okay?
Are You Okay? How to Express Concern
Podcasts for Learners of English
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Today we are going to talk about ways to express concern.
Suppose you are talking to somebody who you think is not feeling well and you want to express concern about how this person is feeling. What you say depends on the particular situation, the closeness of your relationship with the person you are talking to, and how much information you really want to obtain.
Let's look at a few possible ways of expressing concern and discuss when to use - and when not to use - each one.
***
Are You Okay? Are You Hurt?
Let's say you are walking down the
street and you see somebody fall down. You are concerned
that the
person
may be hurt. You should ask, "Are you okay?"
or "Are you alright?" or "Are
you hurt?" Of course, if you think the person
has been hurt badly, do not waste any time with English
lessons; make sure the person is stabilized and phone
911 right away and ask for an ambulance for emergency
help.
Are You Okay?
People who know each other very well
sometimes say "Are you okay?" as a
joke, meaning, "Are you crazy?" I would strongly suggest
that you not use this question in this way, or use it
only with a very very good friend.
Are You Feeling Alright?
If you are talking to somebody you know very well, and you think that this person is not feeling well, you can ask "Are you feeling alright today?" You can be more specific with questions such as, "Do you have a cold?" Of course, here the answer is either "Yes" or "No". These are what we call "closed answer" questions. You should only ask this suggestive type of question if 1) you know the person you are speaking to very well, and 2) this person is not in a position of social superiority.
How Are You Feeling?
Sometimes you are talking to somebody
you know well and you think that this person is not
feeling well, and you would like more than a yes or
no answer. You would like to ask an open-ended question.
You can ask, "How are you feeling?"
This is a good question because it gives the other person
the freedom to answer any way he wants or to give additional
information, and it gives him a way out of the conversation
if he does not want to talk about his health. He can
respond, "I'm not feeling so well"
and tell you more or he can say "I'm feeling
okay" and change the topic. He may even say,
"I'm fine; how are you?"
You Seem Tired.
How do you express concern without
the other person feeling insulted? With a very good
friend or relative who looks tired to you, you can say,
"You seem tired" (e.g. Susanna, you
seem tired today."); or to a very good friend or relative
who is sneezing or coughing, you can say "You
sound like you have a cold" (e.g. Grandma,
you sound like you have a cold."). Open a conversation
this way only with a very good friend because you do
not want the other person to feel insulted.
Giving the Other Person Control of the Conversation
Sometimes you are talking to a person
who in a position of respect,
such as a teacher, a supervisor, a boss, or your child's
teacher. What should you say to a person in a position
of respect or authority if you think this person is
not feeling well? First, it may be socially preferable
to say nothing at all. Your second choice is to
ask an open-ended and neutral question such as "How
are you?" (e.g. "How are you, Officer?")
or "How are you today?" (e.g. "How
are you today, Dr. Gonzalez?") and allow the
other person to control where the conversation goes
from there.
When expressing concern, you can always use the simple and basic question, "How are you?"
* * * SAMPLE DIALOGUE * * *
Music Copyright, permission of Luca
De Bernardi,
www.saguarovideo.it/blog.
Photo of Headphones Copyright Karl-Erik Bennion.
Photo courtesy of and copyright Serge Milman,
www.flickr.com/photos/ktb
Sounds courtesy of
www.freesound.iua.upf.edu,
Creative Commons license
